“Don’t it always seem to go. That you don’t know what you’ve got ‘til it’s gone.”- Counting Crows Big Yellow Taxi
We have all had to quit something and many times it was necessary for our health or well-being. However, I know in my experience, there have been things I have quit that I wish I had not. I think about my time in martial arts and wish I would have kept it up, the self-discipline it taught was amazing. I wish I would have kept playing baseball and tried to play in high school. I wish I would have kept doing theater in high school and not thought too highly of my football potential (which was limited). My list could go on and on, but I am sure I am not alone.
I want to encourage us to think before we take the action of quitting. There are three things we can do to make sure we are making the right or wrong decision to continue or quit something.
A quick disclaimer: Last post I spoke about why we should not give up (link:) I am not saying quit the things that are important (i.e. faith, church, marriage, family, children, etc.). When I say it is necessary to quit something I mean jobs, dating relationships, friendships, etc.
Sometimes it is necessary to quit something, but before we do, we need to take these steps:
1) Ask Why?- What are the motives for quitting? Why do we feel like quitting? If we are thinking about quitting because it is getting too hard, then that is not a good reason. That is considered laziness. However, if we are quitting because we have a better opportunity or if we stay in this position, dating relationship, friendship, etc. we will miss out on something that will enhance us, then that may be acceptable… which leads us to…
2) Pros and Cons- Create a pros and cons list. Weigh out the options you have in front of you. There is a great scene in “Along Came Polly” where Ben Stiller and Jennifer Anniston are on a trip together. She discovers he had a “risk assessment” in regards to their relationship. She got understandably upset, but he was on the right track. We need to think about the best for us. If a certain job has a better insurance package, but less pay, is it worth it? If a position has more leadership and better pay, but no insurance, is that going to be best for us? Weigh them out and make sure we are honest about the pros and cons….which leads us to…
3) Seek Wisdom- Prayer is essential and admittedly it should be listed as number 1, but that is too obvious (I hope!). God does give us direction and gives us friends who know us well for a reason. Seek their suggestions and guidance. Choose the right friends to ask. Make sure they are friends that have our best interest in mind. Listen, accept their advice, and value their presence in our life. A word of caution: Use their information to assist us in our decision making, not finalize our decision. Maybe they can assist in the development of the pros and cons list? I don’t know, that’s just a suggestion.
Life decisions are tough. But, these three steps could help make our decision process easier. I believe it will limit the regret we may have when we go a certain direction. Try these steps next time you have a big decision to make and let me know if they work. Just promise you won’t quit before you know it is the right thing to do.